What to Do When You’ve Outgrown a Version of Yourself That Once Worked Well

Outgrowing a version of yourself is a unique, yet often confusing form of growth. What motivated and mattered earlier doesn’t excite you anymore. In your professional field, the work machinery may be running smoothly. But something inside you is amiss.

Outgrowing what once worked well is not a sign of failure. It is, in fact, a signal that your priorities, values or needs have changed. A particular leadership style, identity, role or pattern may have been the formula for success till now. But the same approach or perspective may not fit or align with your current requirements. 

One of the best things you could do in such a case is to visit a life clarity coach. The coach helps you understand your earlier version, as well as your newer self. 

Self Analysis

The foremost thing to do is to get into the specifics. It is all too easy to broadly feel that you are no longer the same self. But with the help of a life clarity coach, you can identify what exactly feels different. Which goals do not motivate you? What habits that you admired once are starting to irk you? Or which responsibility or behaviour that was easy to do now takes a toll on you?

Figuring out the things, patterns or behaviours that really worked well once, but not any more, is a good place to start. 

Quick Read – Why high performers can be excellent at work and still feel unclear about thier own lives

Understand Why

The logical next step would be to just let go of the parts of yourself that you have outgrown. Perhaps change your industry, hire new talent or launch a new product. Or it could be to stop working longer hours, micromanaging or saying yes to all tasks. However, before cutting off completely with your older version or its behaviours, understand why you had them in the first place.

Professionals, and especially senior leaders, carry forward practices and perspectives that they have experienced over many years. They may feel disconnected from them today. But there is no denying that these parts helped them succeed in their professional careers. And perhaps also in their personal lives. Discarding your older version in totality, without understanding why and how it worked, is a loss and a disservice to yourself. A life clarity coach, by using questions and discussions, can help bring clarity to why your older self existed. Also, how and if it can be restructured to align with your current aspirations. 

Identify Current Needs

You feel stuck or stagnated. You want a change, but what is it that you are looking for? A life clarity coach does not give away the answers. You cannot be told what to do. But you can be guided in the right direction to understand which version of yourself wants to make the decision. Is the decision to change being directed by fear, burnout or genuine creativity?

The person that you are today may have only a few parts or desires of the person you have outgrown. But you still may have very little clarity about what to do next. The coach enables you to understand your fears, the shift in mindset, your core beliefs and what gives you fulfilment. Finding answers and clarity to such questions can throw light on what your current needs are. And also, on what you can venture into next. 

Internal Alignment

One of the important things that a life clarity coach does is to help your internal values and thoughts align with your external actions. When you have outgrown a version of yourself, it may require you to ignore external validation. How people have been perceiving or identifying you should not mislead or mask your inner voice. The definition of success changes for you, and it may not match what may seem obvious. 

For instance, you may be in a senior leader role but want to focus on innovation and flexibility in your work schedule. Should you venture into product development rather than rise the corporate ladder? In other words, since you have outgrown a version of yourself, should you follow your inner thoughts or validate external expectations? You may find the answers with the help of a life clarity coach. The coach not only enables you to recognise your newer self, but also guides you in practical solutions, such as experimenting with a new role and reviewing your progress. 

You know you have outgrown a version of yourself. It worked once and led you to become the person you are today. But to move ahead and find meaning in your existence now, you have to have clarity over both versions. A life clarity coach can help you identify what changed and how. As well as what can be done next to fulfil yourself and find purpose.